it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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