Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
