apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
that is very illegal...i love you.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize