Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
