i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize