Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
