just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
