Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Randomize
