her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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