Having a random hookup so left but love u
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
