yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
