hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
