as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
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