Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
