So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
