My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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