so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize