I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
