He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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