dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize