hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
