just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
