this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
