Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
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