so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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