Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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