shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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