I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize