your thong is hanging out like whoa
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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