And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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