I need help removing her.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
