I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
