So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize