there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
