**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
