Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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