party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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