? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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