He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize