Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
