I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
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