u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
