Your face is a jimmy john
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
