Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
