Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
im six kinds of drunk right now
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
