Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Randomize
