There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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