And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
