she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize