I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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