wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
