He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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